Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Henderson, TN

Just got back from a nest cleaning in Henderson, TN.

Henderson is a shit-splat town about 20 miles south of Jackson. This town had - I swear to God - one stoplight. And I'm fairly sure that spotlight was only there to prevent commuters from passing through the town without noticing.

I've been noticing increasing vamp activity in rural agricultural towns in the past couple of years. I can see the appeal; these towns have more than enough people for a successful feeding season, and without the nuisance of properly-equipped law enforcement.

It's how vulgaris vamps are geting out to these bumfuck towns that baffles me. U.S. vamp activity has been, up until recently, restricted to large cities: nests form in abandoned tenements, and vamps tend to stick within 10 or 12 miles of their point of origin. They're not really smart enough to steal cars or drive, and I'd have noticed the inevitable rash of interstate train deaths if they were riding the rails, so how are they spreading?

This nest in Henderson was definitely a city vamp off-shoot; while most of the residents of Henderson wear endless combinations of plaid and denim, the alpha vamp of this nest was wearing a battered DKNY coat and Bally loafers. Whoever this meatbag was in life, he wasn't from Henderson. The beta and theta vamps were a little more vague; in jeans and t-shirts, they could have come in from Memphis or originated in Henderson. But from the delta on down, it was all hillbilly.

The extermination was no biggie. I met Cole and Swoop in Jackson, and we pulled a typical drag-and-burn. They were staying in a rotted-out mobile home right off the main road, and it crumpled quick. If they'd been further into the forest, we might have had sunlight problems, but as it was, the whole thing took about 20 minutes. And, of course, we didn't have to deal with carcasses, because the fires took care of that.

Like I said, the clean was a piece of cake; it's this migration pattern that's really starting to give me the willies. It used to be, we couldn't eradicate them all, but we could generally contain the threat and predict, within 50 miles or so, the next outbreak based on hypothetical infection patterns we had generated by contacts at the CDC. Now something - or somebody - is defying these patterns, and it's fucking me off.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Один из наших контактов сообщило движение в вашем участке. Пожалуйста
посоветуйте.

dhkrauss said...

Anton, you know my Russian sucks, and so does yours. Just speak in the Queen's English like everybody else.

And why are you contacting me here? You're insufferably clandestine...

Fine.

Пошлите детали к мне, и для ради бога, используйте факс.

Anonymous said...

fuck you buddy you ain't fucking english you are american it just so happen's that you ripped off the fucking queen's english get fucked when i say this i mean it only for you you fucking fag no one else in your country is such an open wanker and as for another post i just read u a "vampire"hunter who hates the job and in your word's"it sucks ass"fucking quite you retarded cock juggling thunder cunt.

Anonymous said...

So you use the queens english do you? Wait..you mean MY english, right? don't you forget it bitch, i'm the fucken queen of your dreams, ya ass raping bitch.

Fuck
with
me
some
more
please
Craka

P.s

Did you know Phedophiles are fucking immature assholes?

dhkrauss said...

wow. mayhem, you have a potty mouth. do all british children speak this way? do your parents know?

Anonymous said...

potty mouth i preffer gutter mouth myself do your parents know you are gay??oh and I AM NOT A FUCKING CHILD YOU SIC FUCKING CUNT WHAT IS IT YOU LIKE ABOUT CHILDREN IF I KNOW YOU TO GO ANYWHERE NEAR A CHILD I WILL PERSONLY HUNT YOU DOWN AND TEAR OFF YOUR NUT SACK GOT IT BITCH and yes my parents know i swear they have know i about it for about 20 years now shame at least i can let them know there's things

Anonymous said...

actually all english children do speak that way you fuck tard!! get bent you total tosspiece. you don't speak the queen's English you don't fuckin deserve it you knobend. yeah i do hav a fuckin "potty mouth" and you do too you fucking child molesting dickwad.
love miss marple
p.s. the ENGLISH detective you asshole.

Anonymous said...

Well well, It would appear you are still harping on about being a vampyre hunter, god, you'll not get out your moms basement will you? afraid of the day time with all the people around? Man, you suck..i'm not even going to insult you properly, just get a life