It burns!

So the first "experiment" we tried involved using a high-powered tranquilizer rifle to shoot darts filled with various vile things into the vamp. We tried a bunch of shit, with varying degrees of success:

1. Tranquilizer - Yeah, that wasn't worth a shit. We tried shooting him about six different places, with no effect at all. Pretty much as expected. Wasn't until we got a direct headshot that the fucker stopped moving around for 20 minutes or so.
   
   Remember that a vamp is essentially reanimated meat - the heart, while serving as a core of some kind, doesn't actually beat. Sound weird to you? The thing eats people by drinking plasma; try to keep the weirdness in perspective.
   
   
2. Silver nitrate - We shot the first dart into old Smiley's wrist. He didn't like that at all. The skin just under the dart bubbled up like a third degree burn, and he let loose with one of those throaty, Bea Arthur-type growls the bloody vamps are so fond of. Still, silver nitrate is a fairly expensive chemical, and the effect wasn't crippling - it pretty much just pissed him off. All things considered, not a weapon worth pursuing. Still, it was neat target practice, though we had to gag him after about six shots or so; he was killing my buzz.
   
   
3. Poison - None of the human poisons we tried worked worth a shit, though arsenic did seem to make him a little itchy.
   
   
4. Ash sap - This was a stupid idea. Nat thought that maybe - because the grave stakes we used are made of ash, that ash sap would have some kind of corrosive properties. It didn't. I could've told his stupid ass that.
   
   
5. Holy water - Holy fuck, was that awesome. Holy water is always a nifty spectacle, with the burning and the screaming. But eventually, either the vamp wipes it off or it evaporates off, leaving behind third degree burns that look bad, but won't really have a lasting effect.
   
   Intravenously, though, is a different story. That shit stayed in there. The vamp was screaming and wailing for about the first half hour, then just whimpering for the next couple of hours. The holy water never loses its sanctification, and with no place to go, it just swishes around and burns.
   
   The best part was, the more he moved around, the worse it got. Stupid fuck kept shaking, and the stuff kept swishing around his useless veins and shit, burning him from the inside out. I mean sure, it's not lethal, but I'd buy a tranq rifle out of pocket just to watch that again.