Killing the dead

There are a number of valid ways to kill a vampyr. None of them involve garlic. The only thing garlic will kill is your sex life.

1. Stake through the heart. A stake through the heart will work, but this is not as simple as grabbing a fence picket and giving a vampyr what-for. First of all, the stake has to be constructed from ash wood. Secondly, it has to be what is known as a grave stake, a cross that is designed to be driven into the ground as a stake. The cross can be crude or fancy; it doesn't matter. It must, however, be consecrated for use in blessing the dead. For this, I suggest getting ordained. Sure, the Bible's a big book, but reading it beats the hell out of being eaten. If you can whisper a quick consecration (I've got it down to under 5 seconds), you're in the bag.
   
   Remember to pierce the heart entirely; you can't do this with your bare arms. You'll need a mallet to do this with. I suggest Sears; they have a great assortment of rubber mallets for a very reasonable price.
   
   It is unwise to attempt to stake a vampyr in combat; this method is too clumsy, as it requires two hands and precise aim. Instead, it is better to invade a sleeping vampyr nest and quietly stake them. This method is preferred for exterminating vampyrs that were once friends, as it is more dignified than decapitation.
   
   (Note: Ekkimu will not notice a stake through the heart, as their origin is not really the same as the vampyr. Forget the stake and get chopping.)


2. Silver through the heart. The whole thing about silver is its purity. Vampyrs can't stand purity (hence the consecrated ash wood). Silver through the heart will kill most weaker vampyrs. Silver through any other body part will sting like a bitch.
   
   However, just like with the stake, the silver must be consecrated. Everything must be consecrated for this job. Everything I own is consecrated. Everything.
   
   A note on silver bullets: Silver makes for bad bullets. It is too soft for ballistic use, and may misfire or fail to puncture the rib cage at enough velocity to pierce the heart. If you must use a silver projectile, use a silver-tipped arrow or bolt. It may look archaic, but it works.
   
   I have heard of hunters using silver nitrate in various forms. This new-fangled shit doesn't hold much water, if you ask me. It will burn a vamp, but it will most likely not kill it, and holy water is a much cheaper vampyr corrosive. Forget silver nitrate.
   
   (Note: the silver method works only on young (stripling) vampyrus vulgaris. Ekkimu and vrykolakas will be unaffected by silver, and older vulgaris may survive a silver heart-wound.)


3. Decapitation. This is, oddly enough, the easiest way to kill a vampyr, once they've been weakened with an assortment of other (consecrated) crap. I recommend a machete for this purpose. It's lightweight and you can purchase one at any major gardening store.
   
   You do not have to consecrate an object for use in decapitation. Separate the head from the body, and you've won. It doesn't matter how you do it. However, having a holy machete does have its advantages. It cuts a little easier, hurts them a little more, and just generally makes you feel pretty cool having it.


4. Fire. Fire will kill a vampyr, so long as it is entirely consumed, and burned completely to ashes. Vampyrs are not, however, any more combustible than humans, so fire can be a really tricky tool. You need a lot of it, and you need to keep the vampyr - which, unlike a human, will not die quickly - from moving around and putting itself out. For these reasons, I don't recommend fire as a combative tool in most circumstances.


5. Direct sunlight - Ah, the old standby. Sunlight. Vampyrs can not stand sunlight. Some of the old ones can take a little ambient sunlight, but there isn't a vamp alive that can take the God-light at full blast. They will burst into flames. This is by far the easiest, least risky, and most satisfying way to kill a vampyr, as it is one of the only vamp-lethal weapons that can't be turned against you.
   
   Be aware that a flaming vampyr can still cause damage, if only by setting other things on fire. You may want to keep a fire extinguisher handy for this purpose. However, you must let a vampyr burn out entirely. When a vamp burns, all that can be left is ashes. A vampyr in sunlight will usually take 30 seconds to incinerate entirely, depending on size and age.